Lost in love...

Ahhh... finally the weekend is almost here. Have so many things to do though this weekend...tons of house chores are waiting for me.


The past few months have been weird to me in terms of my love life. I've gotten to know a few guys during the past few months through friends and when they want to pursue into a deeper friendship/relationship, I rejected them. It started after this guy that I like and love hurt my feelings badly. After that incident, another guy came in to my life. I didn't like him in the beginning and I think that we didn't click with each other but I continued seeing him...trying to like and accept him as a friend.Then, after a while, problems came between us and I began to see all his true colors and I realized that I'm looking for excuses for not being with him, and that's when we broke off. I was glad that it's over though. A while after that, I got to know another guy. This time i was acting even weirder. A friend introduced us and at the very beginningI didn't feel that we clicked. I refused to meet him...not even once. This time, I finally realized that I can't lie to myself anymore. There is no point of me trying to accept someone when my heart is not ready for that person. I was also thinking about the other party. I would want to continue giving hope to him when at the end of the day I would break his heart. It would be better that I ended it earlier... before more damage is done.

I was thinking...am I going crazy?... or is it a midlife crisis? haha...do women has a midlife crisis too? Could it be like this...previously I was a loyal lover and now I want to do what others did to me and my heart? It could be a revenge in a way. It also could be that all these guys are not the right man for me so that is why I don't feel the spark from the very beginning.

"You can close your eyes to the things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel." --submitted by Jessica

Could it be that I'm closing my heart because I was hurt badly before? Hmmmmm....I don't think so. I have the strong feeling that I am feeling like this now because I still have not found my true love. Does true love exist in this world? That is something for me to ponder...

"I thought I loved him, but he had to break my heart for me to know what true love really is." ---Anonymous

"The best thing about loving and being hurt is that you get to know what true love really is. For as gold is tested in fire, and so will love be perfected in pain." --- Marvin Jay M. Torres

"No matter how ugly you think you are, that special someone that loves you believes you are the most beautiful and irresistable thing on earth and nothing can ever change that." --- Source Unknown

"To love someone is to understand each other, to laugh together, to smile with your heart and to trust one another. One important thing is to let each other go if you can't do this." --- Source Unknown